Thursday, March 29, 2012

Month 4 Update Officially down 25lbs!!

My weight as of this morning was 174.6, which means I am under 175 and that is 25 lbs lost. Yeah!

I was dreading today all day yesterday. It is such a mind game for me. So worried I won't see a loss and feeling super peckish all day too. It is so weird how it effects my whole mood, I really need to work on that or think more about why I allow it to effect me so much. 

So my stats of today are.

Down 3" from last month.

Hips 43
Waist 36
R Thigh 24
R Bicep 13
Chest 38.5

and here are my pics from today. Even braving the sports bra for you all! ahhhhhh!

and here I am with clothes, ha ha

I am not losing as fast as I would like to, and I probably won't be 165 by the marathon...
but I am losing and I will at least be 170 which will still be HUGE for me.

It's still losing, even if it is slow.

Thursday, March 22, 2012

Weekly Weigh-In & Update: 3/22/2012

Today I am at....
Yeah I lost 1.5 lbs this week, yeah!!

So let me fill you in with how I am doing, really.

I am still trying, but I am slacking a bit for sure, even though trying to be aware.

I was having a huge craving since about this time last week for a shake that they make at Good Times.

You know the one with peanuts, peanut butter, chocolate and all that.

YEAH, that one.
So I made the decision I was going to have one, on Saturday, after my long run, as a treat.

And that night I was so tired my husband just got us dinner from there. Usually NOT such a good thing.

I decided to just have him get me a kids meal. So I had the cheeseburger, the fries, and the shake.

I think this is a good lesson for me, because I can eat these things in moderation...SOMETIMES!

Last week I tracked my calories on Spark People and I think I have decided I  will track them every other week just to keep them in line.
There is something I really like about doing this on my own and not on any program, it helps me rely on my brain rather than a system that I am not sure how really works, but I lose weight on it. I feel like learning to know how much I can eat and still lose is empowering.

I am still nervous about when the day comes when I am not running anymore, but again, I can't worry about that until I cross that bridge.

I really want to kick things up for April.

It looks like I am on track to have lost 5 maybe 6 lbs for the month of March, which is great...but I really wanted to be 165 by my marathon. So if I can the full 2lbs every week I should be able to make that especially with my most training happening in these next few weeks. So, I may need to be a little more vigilant and try to add a few more workouts in...if I can keep my eyes open.
Thanks, cause I'm slow or slower. 
This training makes me SO tired-slash-STARVING!!!

Will keep you posted...

Thursday, March 15, 2012

Weekly Weigh-In & Update: 3/15/2012

Morning All!

The scale this morning said....


Down 1.3 lbs!

I'll take it.
I would love to be losing 2 lbs a week, but I will take what I can get.

I was reading my old weight loss blog and there would be times when I would loose 2.5 lbs a week back to back, that is crazy! I do need to remember tho, that was losing mostly baby weight, so I think that comes off more easily.

Not sure what this weight is, uhhh I think just Ashley weight. Ha ha.

I feel like the deficits I am making in calories, just because of the mass amount of running I am doing, should be causing a little bit more loss? is what it is, and it's still good and I was thinking I might not see it on the scale this morning because my husband and I went out for dinner last night: read: SODIUM and water retention, but it broke through. Yeah!

I am seeing other changes as well, in my mind. Like last night we went to the mall to walk around after dinner and we went by the Rocky Mountain Chocolate Factory. It wasn't the reason we went there and I got 2 pieces of no sugar added chocolate and I only ate one when we got home.
 Before I would not be OK with such a small dessert if we were going to have dessert, or I would have gone to the mall with the whole intent to get something from there.

The other thing that I find in my mind a lot is fear of the future. It's a strange thing, and I need to figure out how to deal with it and think about what I want to do.

The fear is this, sure it's easy to lose weight now...I am running my butt literally OFF. I am burning so many calories, it's just happening. But what happens after the marathon is over? That won't even be 1/2 way through the year. Will I gain it all back, will I lose momentum, will I slide back into my old ways? I really really don't want to, I want this to be a permanent change. I am just fearing it. I need to think of a plan instead of just being afraid. I know I can keep running, but I am not going to continue to ask my sister in law to watch my son all the time like she is now in order to meet my marathon goal. I know being a "marathoner" isn't exactly in the cards for me anytime soon other than this one. Why? Because I have a  two year old and we want to get pregnant again perhaps this summer. 


I fight that little voice everyday.  It’s still beating me, but one day Imma kick it’s scrawny ass.

fighting it all day errday 
I would ideally really like to meet my goal weight before I try and get pregnant again, I know I am scared of that too. I will have lost all this weight, able to feel confident and better for about 3 months, only to gain it again. I know I don't have to throw caution to the wind like I did last time, but last time was so strange and traumatic for me, it just ALL scares me.

Well, I can't control something that is 6 months away, I can only control today, so I will focus on that...and maybe make that my mantra. Because I can make good choices today, and all those choices, day by day, add up. Right?
Any suggestions or thoughts?

Thursday, March 8, 2012

Weekly Weigh-In & Update: 3/08/2012

Welcome back to this week's weigh in.

Drum Roll Please.....

Today I am 178!!!!


Down a 1.5 lb from last week, and this was the number I really wanted to see.

Last weekend I was starting to get worried and down because I had a "tough" eating weekend, more like Thursday through Sunday if I am honest.

We ate out all 4 of those days, and by Monday morning I was up 3 lbs. So discouraging! 
I decided that I needed to start tracking my calories again since I had drifted away from my eating plan. As I did I noticed that a shake that I was having every day was WAY more calories then I had thought it was. So maybe I won't make that every day. Everything in it was so good, I thought it couldn't be bad...but turns out, when you are trying to lose weight you really have to pay attention. So I will keep tracking so it can keep me in line. Its amazing how many calories you can be consuming without even realizing it.

Only 8 more lbs to go till my first goal weight!! I really want to get focused again so I can get there before my birthday at least. If I stay on this track I should be able to do it.

Also, people are starting to notice I think. I have seen my body changing slowly over the past three months and I just know I have a long way to go still, but other people are telling me I look smaller. Yeah! It's actually real. Sometimes it feels like it takes so long that nothing is really changing, if that makes sense.

Pray for my first 15 miles this Saturday, I am kinda nervous!!!!